The Legend of Lobo

Once again we ventured to one of the most beautiful places on the planet for a brief vacation. We hit all the usual places and enjoyed the splendor of Monterey, Big Sur, and Pacific Grove. We stayed at a new place this time…although it was comfortable, it didn’t have the charm of Asilomar. Even so, we had a great time as we always do. But perhaps the most amazing thing about this trip is Logan’s desire for a hat! Logan has never been a hat kid and always knocked anything we tried to put on his head. Yet, when he hit the aquarium store, he saw a stingray baseball hat and had to have it. He’s been wearing it gleefully ever since!

Logan’s Lego skills continue to evolve. No surprise since he works on them constantly. The vehicles above only use a few sections that I had made with him from a kit…the rest  came entirely from his own efforts. It’s striking how talented he is becoming. For instance, he’s getting really good at building symmetrically. Logan also builds with specific intentions—he knows what he wants, even if he gets frustrated when he can’t quite get there right away. But he is incredibly tenacious. Once he gets it in his head what he wants, he won’t quit fiddling until he’s satisfied. As hard as he can work on a piece, he is happy to strip it and start again.

John Dudley Hayes
June 11, 1936 – April 27, 2014

My father’s death is the first one Logan has experienced.  I hope we can comfort him as he learns about loss and grief.  And I hope he manages to hold onto some memories of his Grandpa John.  I feel fortunate that we have been able to visit my parents often and that my father had a chance to know Logan and his cousin Adam.  The boys were a late-life surprise, and they brought real joy to Dad’s final, difficult years.

The last conversation I (or anyone) had with my father was about Logan, when I was visiting Dad in hospice care in San Antonio. He was in a wheelchair, unable to speak and barely able to stay awake.  Although his doctor had prepared us to expect a quick decline into immobility and then unconsciousness, it was hard to see my father so weak and unresponsive. He brightened when I showed him pictures of Logan, and he even managed to lift his head, smile, and nod.  I felt so thankful to have Ash’s wonderful photos to share with him.  When I put the pictures away Dad fell asleep for the last time.  Five days later he passed away peacefully while Grammy June and I sat by his bedside.  I will always be grateful that his last conscious moments were brightened by Logan’s happy, smiling face.  I hope one day Logan will understand and find comfort in this story.

After years of mop tops, I finally took Logan to get a real haircut. I had my own stylist do the job and, honestly, he didn’t quite do what I asked. I did want it pretty short, but I had specifically asked for the front to stay a little longer…but I think he got carried away and he buzzed it down everywhere. On the plus side, he won’t be needing a new cut any time soon 🙂

Logan’s fascination with Legos has become a full-time obsession.  He jumps out of bed to play with them first thing in the morning and keeps on all day until bedtime — which he resists mightily. Tonight he climbed out of bed no less than six times to tinker with his latest Lego construction, adding one last piece here, adjusting a detail there — and howling with frustration when the pieces wouldn’t stay together.  He finally fell asleep around midnight.  It’s a Lego life for Logan. There’s nothing else he enjoys doing half so much, so if we’re at home, he’s building.

His initial love for minifigures (“Lego guys”) and tiny weapons has evolved into a passion for vehicles of all kinds — boats, planes, spaceships, and of course trucks. Most of his original designs are hydrids, with wheels, wings, claws and other interesting appendages.  I’ll ask him, “Is it a plane?” and he’ll say, “No!  It’s a motorcycle flyer!” or something equally esoteric.

He enjoys giving each creation a three-word name, and some of them  are quite entertaining.  Occasionally when he christens a new vehicle the name is so quirky and delightful that I laugh out loud.  Logan frowns at me.

Recent names:

Dragon Wing Flyer
Jay’s Bug Flumer
Eagle Claw Motorcycle
Shark Forces Hopper
Bug Homer Grabber
Hummer Hoper Scoper

Four is a very fun year.  We’re all enjoying it.

It started so simply. Last summer I wanted to find a way to encourage Logan’s fine motor development, so I bought him a little Lego police car kit. It had about 30 pieces, and I thought it might be too complex for him. He loved it! He instantly understood how to assemble the tiny plastic bricks and spent hours taking apart the pieces and creating new objects.  He especially loved the minifigure, or as he calls him, the “Lego guy,” with a tiny star badge, broad-brimmed hat, and a glorious gold belt buckle.

Next we added to our collection with a moon-rover driven by an astronaut and then a mini speedboat with a surfer. By then Logan was hooked, and so was I! Legos saved my sanity on our long plane flights this fall. And I wasn’t above using the small kits as bribes. In Romania, Logan and his cousin Adam bonded over their new Lego kits, playing happily for hours while eyeing one another’s mini-figs. We left a trail of Lego pieces from Romania to California, and even cried a bit when we lost first Gandalf’s hat and then an awesome glow-in-the-dark mummy. But it was worth those sacrifices to gain a sure-fire way to hold Logan’s attention.

When we got back to California we moved up to the big-kid kits, the ones with 300-500 pieces. For the last two months we’ve been building forts, elf towns, and Ninja castles. Logan can look at any illustration and build exactly what he sees. It’s pretty remarkable. His favorite sets include knights, Hobbits, or wizards. But his true passion is weaponry. He loves swords, axes, and staffs (which he calls staffsesses). Perhaps “obsessed” is a better word…he is constantly mixing and matching various Lego pieces to create new and incredibly inventive weapons. He is so attached to his mini-figs and creative weaponry that he insists on going to bed at night clutching at least a couple of them. Before he falls asleep he often pops up out of bed to come into the living room (usually saying “I forgot something!”) to grab new pieces so he can keep building.

I’m both astonished and dismayed by his inventiveness in creating bizarre wands and fantastical weapons. Our apartment is constantly littered with tiny pieces of plastic, and Ash and I have learned to tread lightly in the dark. But things are going very well in the fine-motor department.

Logan and I are earning lots of airline miles this fall. Just after we returned from Europe, we learned that Grandpa John was would be getting intensive chemotherapy treatments in Texas. We hopped on another plane to visit him in the hospital and share some stories and chocolate milkshakes. Uncle Joel came from Romania to help out the whole family. It was a stressful time, but also a very meaningful visit for all of us. Logan visited his Austin cousins for Halloween, and even managed to go trick-or-treating with them.  He was a knight, of course. Well, kind of.  He was ambivalent about his costume and only wore about half of, half of the time.  But he had a wonderful time with his Austin family.

We were all very happy that Grandpa John’s health improved after the chemotherapy. After a couple of weeks in a rehabilitation facility, he was able to return home to the comforts of a warm fireplace and his three cat friends, just in time for the holidays. We are all feeling grateful this Thanksgiving.

Logan and Grandpa John

The Maker Faire is a unique event focused on technological creativity. It is a gathering of robots, crafts, science experiments and other fantastical things. It is a sprawl of discovery, art, music, food, and games. We’ve gone three times before but this is the first year that Logan could really interact with the exhibits. He had a ball. Naturally he doesn’t yet understand the more sophisticated tech stuff, but he grasped enough to have fun.

Although a bit out of the way in lovely Alameda, Washington Park is always worth the trip. This park is really a large complex, with several sports fields, tennis courts, large lawns, rec center, dog park, and the awesome play area. We call this play area the Fish Slides for an obvious reason: the large fish-shaped ladder on the main structure. This is easily one of the best parks we’ve taken Logan to…it is large, safe, and has a nice range of big and small slides. We’ve been going for about three years and he’s been able to scale up to more advanced parts of the park as he gets bigger. The place is always full of kids, so Logan never fails to make a “new friend”.

Three months after Logan’s cousin Aria was born, Logan and I traveled with Grammy June to Bucharest for the christening. What a wonderful adventure!  Joel and Claudia showed us the city, and we met their warm, friendly Romanian friends and family.  Logan and Adam enjoyed playing in the park and assembling Legos together.

On a daytrip to the Carpathian mountains, we explored Sinaia and the beautiful nineteenth-century Castle Peleș, with its lovely gardens, fountain and statues.   Logan was enchanted with the genuine suits of armor and the ancient iron weapons that adorned the castle walls.  So many big swords!   Our route passed through charming mountain towns and golden autumn countryside, and we peeked into peaceful Sinaia monastery on the way home.

Aria’s christening was held in beautiful St. Peter’s Church in Bucharest.  Grammy June and I didn’t know what to expect from the ceremony so were pleasantly surprised by the informality.  Family and friends gathered around the altar and font while the priest led Joel, Claudia and Aria’s godparents through a long but relaxed service.  There was incense, chanting, praying, and singing from a small choir of student musicians. The Romanians were all beautifully dressed, and Aria had a mid-ceremony costume change, like a tiny diva! Everyone was smiling during the service, and the smaller children darted in and out, peeking around the adults to see what was happening.  Logan was delighted when Aria finally got her bath in the pretty silver “sink-tub.”  By then he and the other boys were ready for some christening cake.

The party was a big, loud, happy celebration with lots of food, wine, and dancing.  And who was the special guest?  Spiderman!  He entertained the small children with balloon sculptures and magic tricks, while the adults toasted and celebrated.  Joel and Claudia were generous hosts, and their friends were all delighted to help celebrate their baby girl’s big day.  We enjoyed meeting the Romanian aunts and cousins. Aria slept through most of the party, but she made a grand entrance with her nanny Elena for the cake cutting — and yet another round of smiling photos. Romanians really know how to party!

Our church childcare program is held in a building that is used as preschool during the week.  The church campus is high up a steep hill that overlooks San Francisco Bay, with a gorgeous view of the Golden Gate Bridge. The beautiful location inspired the preschool’s name — Skytown. Over the past three years Logan has spent many Sunday mornings at Skytown, and he loves it. The school has a wonderful collection of creative toys and a fabulous playground with a garden, sandbox, and little Fred Flintstone- style cars. And, of course, there are lots of other children to play with.

The four dedicated childcare providers have watched Logan grow up.   Mr. Tim is the childcare director, and Logan has developed a special bond with him. They love to play together with Legos or make music or cook breakfast in the little toy kitchen. A few weeks ago during a drive in the car, Logan said, quite out of the blue, “I really like Mr. Tim!”  That was wonderful to hear.

Tim and his teammates Meuy, Kamchan, and Annie have been with us through many ups and downs as Logan learned to walk and talk, play nicely (most of the time) and use the potty.  They have encouraged him with gentle guidance and lots of laughter. We’re very fortunate they’re part of his life.

There are few parks as awesome as Frog Park. On the whole, Frog Park is actually a 1/2 mile greenbelt with two playspaces on either end. For the last couple of years, Logan has been a huge fan of Hardy Playground, which we’ve been calling Frog Park. This is a magical space with imaginative play structures, a big sand box, and a neat man-made pond. For a long time Logan struggled with the main structure since it was really designed for kids above the age of 5, but now he dominates it. And nearly every time we go he makes at least one new friend that he gets to chase and laugh with.

Amazingly, we just recently stumbled upon the sister playground to Hardy. On the southern tip of the Rockridge-Temescal Greenbelt (built in 2001) is Little Frog Park and its playspace, Redondo Playground (named for the street location). We recently found it entirely by accident one evening when we were going to the restaurant just next door. It’s a small area tucked behind several buildings such that you wouldn’t know it was there unless you were looking for it.

Redondo Park lies in a grove of redwood trees with several play structures, such as a boat, a sand pit, and two towers with slides. It’s great for parents because the playspace is completely enclosed and so it’s easy to keep track of scampering monkeys. And since it’s so small and hidden away, the park never seems to get all that busy.

Another discovery was the charming creek that runs right past the play area. It turns out that the artificial pond at Hardy turns into a little waterway that travels the length of the greenbelt. Because it was man-made, it sometimes goes underground so it can pass under the roadways. It ends at Little Frog Park where I assume it gets recycled back to Hardy.

Frog Park is a great tale of community planning and involvement. The entire thing was constructed with the help of over 1,000 locals. Not only that, but the space is continually maintained by a volunteer force. This is what happens when people decide to get together to make their neighborhood special, and that’s what makes Frog Park another Oakland gem.

Logan loves his birthday gifts, especially the dolls from the Toy Story cast.  His new favorites, Woody and Zurg, are giant additions to his current line-up, which includes several miniature figures that I found at “the special store” (a super-cool thrift shop), along with a large Slinky Dog with a permanent kink in his coils. Logan has taken to moving the whole gang with him wherever he goes, including car rides and naps.  It’s getting pretty crowded in the bed!

Not content with the birthday bounty, he’s been begging for a cowgirl Jessie and her horse Bullseye.  I really don’t think he needs any more toys at the moment, but I decided this was a good opportunity to help him understand the value of money and the virtue of delayed gratification.  It’s time to save!

We set up a saving jar with a picture of the coveted toys taped on it.  When Logan tidies up his room at the end of the day we give him a few pennies or a nickel to add to the jar.  He loves watching the little stash grow, and he seems to understand that doing his “chores” promptly results in a reward.  He’s learning the names of the different coins and how many cents they are worth.  But patience is coming more slowly.  Each days he begs, “Can I buy Jessie and Bullseye today?  Please, please, please!”  And each day I explain that we have to save more money until we have enough.  I won’t make him wait to bank the full price for the toys, but we do need to stay focused on the delayed-gratification part of the lesson for a bit longer.  And I need to scout out stores to be sure the toys will be in stock when the time comes for the momentous purchase.

Tomorrow we’re taking empty bottles to recycle at our local grocery store so Logan can earn the redemption value. It might top out around 50 cents, which would be a real windfall for his saving jar.  Although he initially dreamed about Jessie and Bullseye, he’s started setting his sights also on Hamm, the pink pig from Toy Story who is both “Evil Dr. Porkchop” and a sweet little piggy bank.  Today he’s been carrying around a picture of Hamm I printed from a toy website.  He’s shown it to everyone he meets, and he became distraught when he spilled bubble juice on it. During his nap he rolled over on it and added a few wrinkles to the streaks.  We may need to buy Hamm first, so Logan will have a worthy place to store his hard-earned pennies.

Sometimes it is the simple things that make the biggest difference in life. About four years ago we purchased a small futon to fit in Janet’s tiny apartment in Salem. Logan was on the way and we knew that late night sitting was in store, so we wanted something more comfortable than the wicker chairs she had used for so long. After moving to Oakland, we kept the futon since it fit in our small apartment—and we also knew that whatever we had would eventually be stained beyond recognition by our frisky youngster.

That premonition proved true as years of milk and juice stains piled up on those white cushions like a bad Pollock painting. We did our best to hide the ruin with colorful cloth, but we could never overcome its inherently shabby appearance. Finally, Janet had had enough…after some careful measuring and scouring online reviews, she ordered an actual sofa for us. I managed to get it put together in about an hour and lo! we had a couch. My first in about 6 years and Janet’s in 8. I took my first dad nap on it that very day and it was glorious.

Logan loves the new couch. Although we are constantly yelling at him, he can’t help but jump on it. Since he’s now too big for two of us in the still-awesome rocking chair, having the sofa is where we can get our snuggle-cuddle on. And it’s finally given us the excuse we need to have the discipline to ban food in the living room, which has gone a long way towards making our carpets less crunchy.

Yeah, a couch is a small thing, but it’s a big presence in our life right now.